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This song was recorded at Audio Recording, Inc. in Seattle by legendary engineer, Kearney Barton (who recorded The Kingsmen "Jolly Green Giant" of "Louie, Louie" fame, The Sonics "Psycho", The Frantics "Werewolf", "Angel Of The Morning" by Merrilee Rush and many others.) It was an 8 track analog studio, recorded onto 1 inch reel tape. Between 1988-1994, I recorded a few dozen songs at Audio Recording, Inc. I returned there once in 2000 for one recording, then again on August 2nd, 2002 for this recording. I have returned there only one other time later in 2004 for a recording of the single CD version of "Jaydena." The CD album version was recorded at Mirror Sound Studio. For this particular recording, I once again performed all the instruments. It was a good recording though I never considered it finished until I did some minor overdubs with keyboards, etc. This song was already mixed onto a CD format, so I didn't need anything except my computer to transfer it over to the Audacity program. This song is #488 that I wrote, though it was actually first recorded around songs #467-468. I just didn't finish it until recently. This song was very personal to me. I was in a long distance relationship that didn't even have a chance to work out. This woman broke my heart in a big way. I had to write about it for me to move on. However, as I was writing this song, I realized it wasn't any run of the mill tune I was cranking out. It was a little more special than that. I took about a month to write it, choosing my words carefully, and working out every detail musically and melodically. I wrote half of this song in front of my then girlfriend who now is my wife. She was impressed that I could write a song and perform it as well as pouring my heart into the words I wrote. I found this to be very attractive concerning my future wife since she didn't get jealous about it nor was she overtly critical or bored with what I was going through. So, in this song, I lost a girlfriend and gained a wife. I find that this song has similar ties to the one I wrote called, "You Don't Want My Love Anymore." But it is this song that is most personal to me for the reasons mentioned above and beyond. This song ties up my entire life of bad relationships and unhappy endings and puts it all into perspective. Prior to meeting my wife, I vowed never to marry again under any circumstances, and most of my friends either believed that would happen or agreed that was probably the best thing. So, this song would probably be my favorite song that I wrote and one of the reasons why I decided to perform all the instruments in it, even though my keyboard skills are very amateur. This song was personal and I kept it that way, until now, for now, I can share it with people. I DON'T BELIEVE YOU ANYMORE YOU HAD ME BELIEVE THAT THE WORLD COULD BE A GENTLE AND BETTER PLACE, TO SHARE MY FEELINGS JUST TO YOU AND THE BEAUTY OF YOUR FACE. YOU MENDED MY SPIRIT AND HAD MY SOUL WRAPPED AROUND YOUR LIFE; BECAME ENTWINED, AND FOR THE FIRST TIME, I WANTED YOU AS A WIFE. ONE SLEEPLESS NIGHT, YOU GAVE YOUR PASSIONS TO SOMEONE ELSE YOU TRUST, BREAKING MY INNOCENT FANTASY, REDUCING LOVE TO LUST, THUS SHATTERED ILLUSIONS I KEPT WITHIN MY LONELY, BURNING HEART. MY SOUL NOW FRACTURED DEEP INSIDE AND TOTALLY RIPPED APART. BUT I DON'T BELIEVE YOU ANYMORE. THE LOVE I FELT HAS ENDED FOREVER MORE. AND I CAN'T TRUST YOU ANYMORE. AND I MISS THE FEELINGS—THE MEANING THAT FRIENDS ARE FOR. YOU SAID YOU CAN'T BE WITH A MAN THAT YOU DON'T RESPECT, OR WITH A PERSON WHO WILL TRUST YOU ONLY THROUGH NEGLECT. YET I CAN'T FACE MY LOVE FOR YOU, WHICH, SADLY, HASN'T GROWN, NOR GIVEN A CHANCE TO FLOURISH AND TO BLOSSOM ON ITS OWN. WE HAD AN ARGUMENT THAT WE WEREN'T TRULY A PAIR, OFFENDING ME AND DESTROYING YOU, OUR PAIN DIDN'T SEEM FAIR. YOU REGRET YOU TOLD ME SECRETS FOR WHAT HAD TAKEN PLACE. I WON'T REGRET I'LL NEVER FORGET THE BEAUTY OF YOUR FACE. BUT YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME ANYMORE. THE LOVE YOU HAD, SUSPENDED, FOREVER MORE. AND YOU CAN'T TRUST ME ANYMORE. AND YOU MISS THE FEELINGS—THE MEANING THAT FRIENDS ARE FOR. (SOLO) YOU SAID YOU'RE SORRY FOR THE HURT AND SHARING ME THIS PAIN. I WISH THAT I COULD SEE THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE THAT WE MAY GAIN. SO IN OUR PARTING, I MUST SAY JUST ONE LAST THING TO YOU, THAT I LOVED YOU DEARLY AND I WISH YOU LOVED ME TOO. (BREAK) BUT WE DON'T BELIEVE IN US ANYMORE. THE LOVE WE HAD IS GONE FOREVER MORE. AND WE CAN'T TRUST US ANYMORE. AND WE MISS THE FEELINGS—THE MEANING THAT FRIENDS ARE FOR. AND YOU DON'T WANT ME ANYMORE. WE'VE BROKEN OUR DREAMS FOREVER MORE. I'M AFRAID TO TRUST YOU ANYMORE. WE'VE LOST THE FEELINGS—THE MEANING THAT FRIENDS WERE FOR. Written and performed by Wayde K. Brown & The Santairs Copyright 2012—All Rights Reserved Recorded at Audio Recording, Inc. in Seattle, WA. and MINE music Studio in Auburn, WA.

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