Liberation From My Admiration
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I love and hate whenever we conversate
and since you left state a few months back
we kept seperating, no doubt about that.
i thought i was changing when i moved to my dads
and thought after graduating you just you just be a fad
no longer infatuating and elating this lad
but now im contemplating how that decision whas bad
cause my vision of dating you keeps making me glad.
so lately ive been sad about what weve come to be
and im sorry i almost convinced you to stop texting me
but in context the effects of my nice routeen
wasnt for sex cause what i wanted next was a dream.
see since i was 13, girls never caught my eye
then you walked by and world changed on the fly
your head was held high and I didn't know why
I felt I had to try to meet you and at least say hi
but i was too shy to chat or confront you
so I laid back instead of trying to hunt you
little did I know, you had an eye on me too
but by design you knew exactly what to do
you threw hints at me again and again
and youre crew of friends followed the trend
but ignorance works in a really strange way
cause you can only learn on a much later day.
and the greater the hater, the more left to learn
and i was always right til the first day that i burnt.
I lost a lot of time playin games,
and writing rhymes about bein tame,
but now since my life counldnt be any more lame
i gotta take a strike without regretting or shame.
cause im betting a wedding and changing youre name
would be upsetting to many and im the one to blame
but theres no forgetting im stepping over their defame
once i show ya im the best for ya, lemme explain

from first blink when i wake, i think of your face
and how with a wink you make my mind race,
one part of me starts the day like the rest of the world
but the other part cant start til i can call you my girl,
so will you give it a wirl? so i can shine like a pearl
and blind you each night with a mind thats real
and a heart of steel that only you can feel
pumpin blood in my body for you from head to heel
I think I started out with perfection
Cause you were the first girl I showed any affection
The first and last kiss I remember was with you
Back in September when the grass was covered in dew
2008 was a long time back
But I have no problem remembering that night on the track
At the time I thought I really liked you
But I wasn’t sure of anything cause I was indecisive
Our communication wasnt clear but when you were near I got a vibe
That told my inside someday youd be my miss
Then I was told to hold your ass and give you a kiss
From there my shell started to peel, I went home that night and shit got real
I could feel all sorts of things I never had before
And I knew that forever id always be yours
But I could never face you with others around
So I debated dating you, and I wasnt down
I thought the whole town would frown at such an astounding girl
With a kid from another county giving dating a whirl
Over the years my feelings never subsided
I still have dreams of you when I close my eyelids
I enjoy you in my head, I really don’t know what else can be said
except One day I know we’ll be wed, cause I cant see myself with another girl instead

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